Mortal Desire Read online

  ‘Liam aka Henry, what do you know about Sarah Flynn?’

  ‘Sarah Flynn has red hair, green eyes, a beautiful smile. She is tall and slender. Men notice her. She can be nervous at times shown by the way that she knots her fingers together, like you are doing now. She is pleasant to all her talk to her, but you can see her summing people up, like you are doing to me now. And that is the end of the Sarah Flynn reading for today.’

  ‘How old are you?’

  ‘Twenty-eight.’

  ‘Do you wish to work as an Elevator Operator for the course of your natural working life?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Elaborate.’

  ‘That is not a question.’

  She rolled her eyes at me. ‘If you could choose to do a different job, what would it be?’

  ‘I would like to be a seeker, a healer.’

  ‘Which one, a seeker or a healer?’

  ‘Both.’

  ‘How can a person do that?’

  ‘By study, observation.’ I was lying. I had a gift that I was forbidden to use.

  ‘Are you studying?’

  ‘Bing! Your twenty questions are up. Shall we continue our journey to the ground floor so that you can emerge enlightened about me?’ I said as I stood.

  ‘Only if you remove your eye lenses so that I can see your blue eyes Liam,’ she said to me standing, moving closer and placing her hand on my arm.

  I breathed deeply as she touched me. ‘I can’t do that Sarah. Not here. Not now.’ I pushed the ground floor button and the elevator descended. The doors opened without a sound, and I waited for Sarah to step out of the elevator first.

  ‘If you wait five minutes I can go and remove my eye lenses and meet you at the revolving doors ... if you like.’

  She turned to face me, and nodded. ‘I like. I will wait. Do I call you Henry, or Liam?’

  ‘For you, I will answer to either. But if I answer to neither, know that it is for a reason.’

  She took a deep breath and smiled a little. I brushed my hand over hers as I left to remove the lenses from my eyes.

  *~*~*~*~*

  She stood to the left of the revolving doors reading her cell phone, twirling her hair around her finger while she waited for me. I wanted to do that. The blackness of her fitted dress emphasized the deep red orange colouring of her hair, and her eye catching figure.

  As I walked towards her, she glanced up at me—twice, and smiled.

  ‘Let’s get you home Miss Sarah, before the predators are let out to play,’ I said, pulling my black three quarter length coat on.

  She folded my collar over and looked deeply into my blue eyes and then my lips. I smiled crookedly at her.

  ‘Ah—there are the eyes that I love, Liam,’ she said, almost like a melody. I bowed my head and looked to the floor and closed my eyes feeling self-conscious.

  We cannot be together, we cannot ...

  She slipped on her coat and we left the building. I pulled the collar of my coat up to cover my neck, to cover my scent, and then tucked my hands into my pockets.

  Sarah linked her arm through mine and we fell into the same walking rhythm to the taxi rank. If I was mortal, I am sure that my heart would have beat as one with hers as well.

  ‘How is your head?’ I asked her when we sat in the back of the cab together, chemical attraction bouncing between our close bodies.

  She touched the back of her head where she had hit it against the brick wall the previous night. ‘Funny, I haven’t even thought about it since I met you tonight. Selena must have fixed it!’ Sarah said, and then looked at me with a huge grin on her face, and touched my hand with hers.

  For a moment in time her eyes froze in mine, although it felt like an eternity. She had unknowingly pulled some of my amnis from me, for I felt it leave my hand. Immediately I worked hard to pull it back to me.

  The red thread was stronger than I thought ...

  The cab stopped at exactly the precise moment that was necessary to break the magic between us. With a silent sigh of relief I slid out of the cab and went around to open Sarah’s door for her, like a gentleman should.

  She stepped out and stood directly in front of me with her eyes settling on my lips. Her unspoken question of a kiss painted a perfect picture in my mind.

  No was the answer.

  I wished it could be a yes, but both of my cards dealt to me said no.

  I closed the cab door and walked beside her into the building, making sure that my hands were tucked into my pockets so that she couldn’t entwine her fingers with mine. How would I control my amnis then?

  We entered the elevator and I leaned on the hand rail while Sarah stood near the buttons.

  She looked at me and smiled. ‘Which floor would you like to go to tonight sir?’ she said in a low voice, her face serious.

  ‘Number sixteen please, Miss.’

  She nodded her head at me and pushed the button to light up number sixteen, and stood back as pleased as punch.

  Without warning, I leaned forward and pushed every number on the elevator buttons.

  ‘What are you doing Liam?’ she said in horror. Her eyes pierced mine.

  ‘I am teaching you something that may save your life Sarah.’

  ‘And what could that possibly be Liam? Who are you? My body guard or something?’ Her voice was full of bitterness.

  I ran my hand through my hair as I felt compelled to tell her my knowledge. ‘You have to know that if you ever get into an elevator with someone that you feel highly uncomfortable with, or you feel threatened by, they are less likely to attack you if you have every floor pressed. There is less time for them to hurt you, and you have a possible escape on every floor. I ... I ... just want you to be safe.’

  She looked at her knotted hands and then up at me. The elevator rose and stopped at four levels before she finally spoke to me again. Her face was full of anguish and pain when she looked up into my eyes.

  ‘Hold me please Liam ... just hold me.’

  I remained where I was, leaning against the hand rail of the elevator with my hands behind my back. I had avoided direct human contact like this for the last four hundred years for a reason. I had only allowed myself to make physical contact through my hands, and briefly at that. If I held her in my arms, she would be enveloped by the blue energy that supported my being.

  It was a blue energy that connected me to our Higher Power, and it was highly addictive to mortal humans. She would be transported to a level of consciousness that showed her things beyond the physical world, both good and bad. She would either be repelled by me, or unwilling to part with me. This could only end badly unless, I focused inwards and tried to pull the blue energy to the core of my being, leaving as little energy force around me as I could.

  And, after all, I wanted to be a seeker, a healer. She was seeking me and I could heal her.

  I took a small step towards her and held out my hand to hers to pull her towards me. She looked into my eyes. There, I saw her deep sadness and pain.

  How could I not help her?

  I wrapped my arms around her as she leaned into me, closed my eyes and intensified my focus onto visualizing my blue energy field and pulling it inside of me, away from her as much as I could.

  I felt her relax in my arms, and then tighten her grip around me. I placed my hand on her head and lowered my lips and kissed her temple. I had visions of our lips touching in a sensuous lingering way. I had never kissed a woman before, and I had never desired it. But I craved for it now.

  Forbidden fruit ...

  I felt that I could not win, stuck on this Earth as an immortal, feeling the desires of the flesh, and the desires of my higher spirit which did not need the physical passions of the human body at the same time. It was a bad mix to have, stuck in between the two worlds.

  ‘Sarah, we are at the sixteenth floor. I’ll walk you to your door,’ I whispered into her sweet smelling hair and released my arms from around her.

  ‘Mmmm,’ s
he hummed like she was high on something.

  It was my blue energy. That is what it does to mortals. This was exactly what I was trying to avoid. At least she didn’t get the full force of it because then she would have had a fatal addiction.

  She linked her arm with mine and we fell into step and walked to her apartment door. She didn’t knock or get her key out. Instead, she turned to me and drank in my eyes, connecting us again.

  I should have looked away or knocked on the door for her, but I didn’t want to. The chemical reaction to her in my human body was of pure elation. I needed more of her.

  She moved her hand up to the side of my face and touched me with a lightness that ignited my being. ‘Thank-you Liam,’ she whispered. She moved so close to me that I was sure that she was in my blue energy zone. But I didn’t care. I just wanted to feel her lips on mine. My body was aroused and I had never felt this awareness before. It was like a drug.

  She tilted her head and closed her eyes, our lips almost touching. I blinked hard to break my heightened sense of arousal.

  What was I doing? She and I could never be a ‘we’.

  ‘Good night Sarah. Thank-you for coming to Selena’s funeral with me ... sleep well,’ I whispered against her lips while I ran my fingers down the length of her hair and stepped back from her.

  She breathed in, deeply gazing at me like a girl crazy in love, in a dreamy state, and smiled before she opened her door and disappeared into her mother’s apartment.

  I turned and headed to the elevator in a brisk walk. The night mist would be coming soon, along with the mysterious seen and unseen creatures of the night. I had to get to the safety of my home.

  Within ten minutes I had arrived at my apartment by cab. The apartment door opened without me touching it.

  Bad news … a reprimand was coming my way.

  Negative vibes flowed from the door like a deep resonating double bass infiltrating the air with sound waves of doom.

  ‘Sit,’ Albert commanded as I hung my coat in the closet.

  I stilled when I heard his voice, steeling myself for words, accusations and rebukes coming my way. At once I sat in the wing chair by the glowing fire and waited for my Protector to talk.

  ‘Albert is an ancient one, and he is there to protect and

  guide you Liam. You must listen to what he has to say, or

  he will be taken away from you ...’

  ‘Yes mother ...’

  ‘You have two problems Liam. One is a menace, and one will be irretrievably fatal for you or me, I do not know which is which yet. I have been given permission only to warn you of the path that you are on, and to think about the consequences of your actions, not only to yourself but others involved. I cannot stress enough that you will not be given your mortality on a silver plate. You have to work for it, unlike the humans who can be saved by Grace alone.’

  Albert had never spoken to me like this before. Our history of communications had always been to mix the serious with jokes, teasing each other affectionately about our misgivings here on the Earth. I expected him to do a post mortem on today’s events, which were numerous, and scold me about the girl. But he did none of those things.

  I could feel a sense of foreboding coming from the man that I had come to love. Something that I was doing had to change.

  I remained in front of the fire place with Matisse curled up beside me, purring each time that I touched her. As the flames of the fire mesmerized me, I went deeper into my conscious thought.

  Was my job the problem, the three immortals, or Sarah?

  My mother had warned me before I left the spiritual realm about the physical realm of the Earth.

  I closed my eyes and allowed the memories of my mother’s advice come to the forefront of my vision. I could see her violet spiritual colour clearly, and the pure love that she folded around me like the wings of an angel.

  ‘... Be careful, don’t get caught in the realm of the perceived

  physical dimension of the Earthly realm as an immortal

  human, unable to return to the Light. The Light is your

  rightful place. You must return to the Light.

  Heed this warning ...

  ... The humans have two types of love Liam. One is true

  and deep, the other is purely physical. They are also known

  as love and lust. You cannot have any lust physical

  relationships with the mortal humans Liam. You will fall

  in true love with a mortal, but you cannot know her in an

  intimate way. It is forbidden for immortal bodies to sow

  their seed with mortal bodies. You do not own the human

  body that you inhabit. It is simply a vessel in which to learn

  your lessons. A mortal body and an immortal body must

  never connect reproductive DNA. Do you understand this

  clearly Liam? This is the law of the universe ...

  ... However Liam, when you become a mortal body, the

  physical side of love will come naturally with true love ...

  But only when you become a mortal being ... you must be sure..’

  So the problem was Sarah? She was mortal, I was not. She was forbidden. But I knew that, so what was the problem ... the three immortals? Are they good or bad—I have no idea until I make contact with them, but then that is a risk in itself ... my job? I was good at it. I worked by the code.

  I stood up and ran my fingers through my hair. The word frustrated came to mind, but that was an understatement. Best if I head off for my nightly ritual of preparation for the delta zone of ministering.

  After the cleansing of my borrowed body I lay in my bed and snapped off the light. At once my room was illuminated by the blue energy mass. But it now had a companion; a glowing spherical mass of soft red. It was sent as a reminder that caution is necessary.

  Pushing my own energies towards the blue mass of light, I drew it back towards me until it rested in the firm hold of my hand. Its force travelled through my borrowed body’s electrical system to the centre of my spiritual being, humming and pulsating.

  I looked forward to this time every night.

  The blue mass of light freed me from the cage of the human body in which I dwelt. It gave me the most amazing sense of euphoria, which was a glimpse into the spiritual realm reminding me of my origin, and my rightful place to return to.

  I placed my other hand around it and held it above my head directly in line with my eyes allowing it to absorb me. I concentrated on the energy of the blue light until it felt that it had entered my mind, or perhaps my mind had entered it.

  I was bathed in the pureness of white Light too bright to look at, but I could feel its powerful energy, filling me with a deep awareness beyond the physical realms of the world. I wanted to fuse with it forever, but I knew that within moments it would be gone. It was a glimpse, a reminder of my home, that’s what it was.

  As the return journey back into my physical body took hold, I became heavy with the burden of my immortal life—my spirit trapped in this heavy, cumbersome shell of flesh, blood and bones.

  Not long now, I told myself, not long now ...

  ‘Il coraggio, la temperanza, la saggezza, la giustizia, la pazienza—courage, temperance, wisdom, justice, patience,’ I repeated into the depths of my consciousness, until the darkness of the unconscious mind embraced me, except for dreams ... vivid dreams of colour and life.

  CHAPTER TEN

  ‘Buongiorno Liam!’

  ‘Good morning Albert,’ I replied.

  ‘Hai guardato nella sfera rossa di cautela?’ he asked.

  ‘No. I did not look into the red ball of caution,’ I replied and studied his face. He was withholding information from me. ‘How do you know that I have a red ball of caution?’

  ‘Because I have one also, Liam,’ he said, not making eye contact with me.

  ‘And you glimpsed into it?’ I asked.

  He looked at me, raised his left eyebrow and shook his h
ead, his double chin flapping in the process. ‘It is not time yet. When it pulsates it will be time,’ he said matter-of-factly.

  ‘The red mass of caution makes me feel uncomfortable Albert.’

  ‘So it should. They are concerned for us. The fact that we both have a red ball of caution means that both of us are in danger.’

  ‘Si prega di accettare le mie scuse Albert. I have brought you to this,’ I said, unable to eat my cooked breakfast this morning.

  ‘I accept your apology Liam. And we both know that we are in continual danger walking the Earth as we are. We must be more diligent with each step that we make. Hopefully we will be able to diffuse the dangerous situation ... ’

  ‘Albert ... how do I pull my blue energy force further into my being so that it cannot be detected by mortal or immortal beings?’

  ‘Infine mi chiedete per la schermatura della forza di energia blu!’

  ‘Yes, finally I have asked you! Just tell me what to do instead of gloating my dear friend,’ I replied with a smirk on my face.

  ‘You must form a small circle with your lips like you are whistling, then suck in air to fill your lungs and hold that air inside of you. Your blue energy force will then be 99.9% undetectable.’

  ‘Grazie signore,’ I said, totally grateful for his information.

  Albert nodded his head to me while I loaded my human body with the food that it needed for energy for the day.

  ‘Vediamo stasera!’ Albert called to me as I opened the door to leave.

  ‘Yes, see you tonight Albert!’ I called back before I disappeared into the outside world.

  *~*~*~*~*

  She stood facing the expansive glass window, looking out into the cloudless day when I stepped out of Elevator Thirteen. She didn’t see me. I took my time soaking her in to my memory while she conversed on her cell phone, tapping her right foot and holding an artist’s canvas in her left hand.

  She turned and our eyes connected, honey-brown to green, before the elevator doors closed, much to my relief. I had to keep my distance from her. She had already had a taste of my addictive blue energy force. It should never have happened. I was careless.

  But she was waiting for me when I returned to the ground floor, sitting on the white leather sofa seat alone. Her chin rested in her hand, propped up by her arm on her knee. A smile lit up her face when she saw me again. She stood and walked towards me, entered the elevator and stood against the side.